How in the hell, after three years, are you still making my life suck? How are you possibly ruining me? Ruining everything I touch? I got away! I got out...alive....That in itself is a miracle. But now...now, after 3 years, you're still fucking up my life! I hate everything about you. I hate this. I hate it. I don't know what to do now...I'm lost.
~~~Isabella, explanation to follow.
Wednesday, June 13, 2012
Wednesday, May 23, 2012
"Be strong and courageous."
Last night I read the first chapter of Joshua. In this chapter, the phrase "be strong and courageous" appeared four times. So I decided to write about it.
Here are some definitions for the word "strong": 1) having, showing, or able to exert great bodily or muscular power, 2)mentally powerful or vigorous, 3)of great moral power, firmness, or courage.
definitions for "courage": 1)the quality of mind or spirit that enables a person to face difficulty, danger, pain, etc. without fear.
"It takes a great deal of bravery to stand up to your enemies, even more to stand up to your friends."
"When you see what is right, have the courage to do it."
"Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go." Joshua 1:9
Because this phrase was in the chapter so many times, it stood out to me. I am getting ready to graduate. Isabella, you just graduated, and are preparing for boot camp in the Army. We both have fears and doubts when it comes to this next phase in our lives. It is a little scary. What's going to happen? Where will we be? I know I think about these questions a lot. And more. We have spent most of our lives in school. Elementary, middle school, high school, college. There is a whole world outside of that. A big world. I know that I don't feel prepared for life outside of school (which is probably why I am trying to go to grad school). This is where we get to fully lead our lives. Growing up, we relied on our parents to take care of us. In college, we became a little more independent, but we had scholarships, housing, campus food. We were still being taken care of a little bit. But now, we head out on our own.
You know what you want to do. You will be trained to be a soldier, then you will become a linguist in whatever language they put you in. Me? I'm still trying to figure out what to do. Yes, I know I want to go to grad school. I want to perform on stage, maybe in tv or film. But there is so much to do to prepare for it. I have to apply to several places, which costs money. I have to take the GRE, which costs money. I have to figure out my area of emphasis, the degree that I want (MA, MFA, ABC). I have to plan for auditions/interviews. I have to write a letter of intent, blah blah blah. Thinking about everything and planning for it just makes my head spin.
What I need to do is put my focus back on God. He is with me. Or, should be. I haven't really being staying in touch with him. I know that with him, his plan will work out. Not my plan. His. I should trust him. You should too.
--Post by Amelia
Here are some definitions for the word "strong": 1) having, showing, or able to exert great bodily or muscular power, 2)mentally powerful or vigorous, 3)of great moral power, firmness, or courage.
definitions for "courage": 1)the quality of mind or spirit that enables a person to face difficulty, danger, pain, etc. without fear.
"It takes a great deal of bravery to stand up to your enemies, even more to stand up to your friends."
"When you see what is right, have the courage to do it."
"Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go." Joshua 1:9
Because this phrase was in the chapter so many times, it stood out to me. I am getting ready to graduate. Isabella, you just graduated, and are preparing for boot camp in the Army. We both have fears and doubts when it comes to this next phase in our lives. It is a little scary. What's going to happen? Where will we be? I know I think about these questions a lot. And more. We have spent most of our lives in school. Elementary, middle school, high school, college. There is a whole world outside of that. A big world. I know that I don't feel prepared for life outside of school (which is probably why I am trying to go to grad school). This is where we get to fully lead our lives. Growing up, we relied on our parents to take care of us. In college, we became a little more independent, but we had scholarships, housing, campus food. We were still being taken care of a little bit. But now, we head out on our own.
You know what you want to do. You will be trained to be a soldier, then you will become a linguist in whatever language they put you in. Me? I'm still trying to figure out what to do. Yes, I know I want to go to grad school. I want to perform on stage, maybe in tv or film. But there is so much to do to prepare for it. I have to apply to several places, which costs money. I have to take the GRE, which costs money. I have to figure out my area of emphasis, the degree that I want (MA, MFA, ABC). I have to plan for auditions/interviews. I have to write a letter of intent, blah blah blah. Thinking about everything and planning for it just makes my head spin.
What I need to do is put my focus back on God. He is with me. Or, should be. I haven't really being staying in touch with him. I know that with him, his plan will work out. Not my plan. His. I should trust him. You should too.
--Post by Amelia
Sunday, February 26, 2012
Getting back on track
I think it is time we tried to get back on track. I want to get in the habit of doing a bible study. So, I am going to try to blog about it again. You can do it with me by reading the same book, or a different book. You can even decide to not do it, and just follow the blog.
I just thought I would let you know about it.
I just thought I would let you know about it.
Sunday, December 25, 2011
Happy Christmas
So, I know I've been failing at this lately and I apologize. I WILL get back into the swing of things, I promise. I just wanted to jump on here and wish everyone a very Happy Christmas. I lovez you guys! Have a great holiday and I will see you on the other side.
Wednesday, December 21, 2011
Hebrews 4:12
"For the word of God is living and active, sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing to the division of soul and of spirit, of joints and of marrow, and discerning the thoughts and intentions of the heart."
The word of God is powerful. When reading the Bible, God speaks to you (or he should at least, if you ask him to speak to you). It can bring you comfort, assurance, and it can tell you something that you may not want to hear, but need to. It penetrates deep.
I'm having trouble getting my thoughts right now, so I found a short devotion over this verse.
v.12 “‘Living and active’ shows that there is a dynamic quality about God’s revelation. It does things. Specifically it penetrates and, in this capacity, is likened to a ‘double-edged sword’ (for the sword, cf. Isa 49:2; Eph 6:17; Rev 19:15; and for the double-edged idea, cf. Rev 1:16; 2:12).
The Word of God is unique. No sword can penetrate as it can.”
“What the author is saying is that God’s Word can reach to the innermost recesses of our being. We must not think that we can bluff our way out of anything, for there are no secrets hidden from God. We cannot keep our thoughts to ourselves. There may also be the thought that the whole of man’s nature, however we divide it, physical as well as nonmaterial, is open to God. With ‘judges’ we move to legal terminology. The Word of God passes judgment on men’s feelings (enthymeseon) and on their thoughts (ennoion). Nothing evades the scope of this Word. What man holds as most secret he finds subject to its scrutiny and judgment.”
(gracepointdevotions.org)
The word of God is powerful. When reading the Bible, God speaks to you (or he should at least, if you ask him to speak to you). It can bring you comfort, assurance, and it can tell you something that you may not want to hear, but need to. It penetrates deep.
I'm having trouble getting my thoughts right now, so I found a short devotion over this verse.
v.12 “‘Living and active’ shows that there is a dynamic quality about God’s revelation. It does things. Specifically it penetrates and, in this capacity, is likened to a ‘double-edged sword’ (for the sword, cf. Isa 49:2; Eph 6:17; Rev 19:15; and for the double-edged idea, cf. Rev 1:16; 2:12).
The Word of God is unique. No sword can penetrate as it can.”
“What the author is saying is that God’s Word can reach to the innermost recesses of our being. We must not think that we can bluff our way out of anything, for there are no secrets hidden from God. We cannot keep our thoughts to ourselves. There may also be the thought that the whole of man’s nature, however we divide it, physical as well as nonmaterial, is open to God. With ‘judges’ we move to legal terminology. The Word of God passes judgment on men’s feelings (enthymeseon) and on their thoughts (ennoion). Nothing evades the scope of this Word. What man holds as most secret he finds subject to its scrutiny and judgment.”
(gracepointdevotions.org)
Monday, December 19, 2011
Hebrews
"You, Lord, laid the foundation of the earth in the beginning, and the heavens are the work of your hands; they will perish, but you remain...you are the same, and your years will have no end." 1:10-12
Everything on this earth will eventually die. The buildings and cars will corrode, people die, animals die, plants die. Mountains will crumble. The sun will eventually burn out. The only thing that will stay forever is God. He has always been here. Since he created the world, he was obviously here before the world. It is kind of hard to wrap your mind around that. We should be putting all of our trust in God, since he is eternal (okay, that is not the only reason to put your trust in him), instead of putting our trust into things that will eventually die.
"Therefore we must pay much closer attention to what we have heard, lest we drift away from it...how shall we escape if we neglect such a great salvation?" 2:1, 2b
Both Isabella and myself have mentioned how we have neglected our walk with God. I think these verses goes with that. Thinking about the depression and money problems and whatnot that we have gone through. It was stupid to think that we could do it on our own. Had we listened to God during these times, things would have worked out differently. But then if we had listened to God, I doubt we would be doing these blogs. If Isabella had talked with God before now, she probably would not have cut herself. She would not be having such a hard time with her breakup. If I had listened to God, I would have had my bills paid off and would not be worrying about it. There is a lot of "what-ifs" in this paragraph. We did neglect our salvation, so we are struggling. Only by building on it now will we get out of our situations. Not saying it will be easy, or that it will happen right away, or that things will go that way that we want it to. But God will deliver us in the way we need to be.
"What is man, that you are mindful of him?"
Why does God care for us so much? We are sinful. We misuse his name. Fight with each other over something as stupid as stealing someone's pencil, or suing someone because the coffee that spilled on them was hot. There is no reason for him to take notice of us. But for some reason, he does. He loves us. He wants us to be close to him. There is something about us that is beautiful to him. He did makes us from his image. If he is beautiful, it makes sense that we are too. We just let the world get in our way. We can't see God so he doesn't really exist. If he didn't exist, how do you explain the world?
Everything on this earth will eventually die. The buildings and cars will corrode, people die, animals die, plants die. Mountains will crumble. The sun will eventually burn out. The only thing that will stay forever is God. He has always been here. Since he created the world, he was obviously here before the world. It is kind of hard to wrap your mind around that. We should be putting all of our trust in God, since he is eternal (okay, that is not the only reason to put your trust in him), instead of putting our trust into things that will eventually die.
"Therefore we must pay much closer attention to what we have heard, lest we drift away from it...how shall we escape if we neglect such a great salvation?" 2:1, 2b
Both Isabella and myself have mentioned how we have neglected our walk with God. I think these verses goes with that. Thinking about the depression and money problems and whatnot that we have gone through. It was stupid to think that we could do it on our own. Had we listened to God during these times, things would have worked out differently. But then if we had listened to God, I doubt we would be doing these blogs. If Isabella had talked with God before now, she probably would not have cut herself. She would not be having such a hard time with her breakup. If I had listened to God, I would have had my bills paid off and would not be worrying about it. There is a lot of "what-ifs" in this paragraph. We did neglect our salvation, so we are struggling. Only by building on it now will we get out of our situations. Not saying it will be easy, or that it will happen right away, or that things will go that way that we want it to. But God will deliver us in the way we need to be.
"What is man, that you are mindful of him?"
Why does God care for us so much? We are sinful. We misuse his name. Fight with each other over something as stupid as stealing someone's pencil, or suing someone because the coffee that spilled on them was hot. There is no reason for him to take notice of us. But for some reason, he does. He loves us. He wants us to be close to him. There is something about us that is beautiful to him. He did makes us from his image. If he is beautiful, it makes sense that we are too. We just let the world get in our way. We can't see God so he doesn't really exist. If he didn't exist, how do you explain the world?
Saturday, December 17, 2011
The Prayer of Faith
Is anyone among you suffering? Let him pray. Is anyone cheerful? Let him sing praise. Is anyone among you sick? Let him call for the elders of the church, and let them pray over him, anointing him with oil in the name of the Lord. And the prayer of faith will save the one who is sick, and the Lord will raise him up. And if he has committed sins, he will be forgiven." James 5: 13-15
This goes along with my first blog. God already knows what you need before you ask him. It doesn't matter what you are going through, whether happy or sad. God wants us to talk to him. We shouldn't just come to him in the bad times. We should go to him in the good times.
I mentioned before that I felt guilty about praying for help when I had been neglecting him for so long. I prayed last night. At least, I think it was last night, might have been the night before. I was pretty much like, "God, you know what I'm going through, but I'm going to tell you again. I ask your help. I will try to accept it, no matter what your answer to me is. Oh, and here are some of my sins."
Here is what is going on with my money situation. I still owe money, but I talked to one of the people in the Admin building, about having my hold temporarily removed so that I could enroll for classes. She removed it, but I have until 6 Jan to pay off my bill for this semester. I am really hoping that I can do it. I can't allow myself to spend any money (which means I should probably cancel my netflix) until after this is taken cared of. I'm going to continue to pray to God about it. Really hoping it works out for me, but I need to trust God. He is in control.
This goes along with my first blog. God already knows what you need before you ask him. It doesn't matter what you are going through, whether happy or sad. God wants us to talk to him. We shouldn't just come to him in the bad times. We should go to him in the good times.
I mentioned before that I felt guilty about praying for help when I had been neglecting him for so long. I prayed last night. At least, I think it was last night, might have been the night before. I was pretty much like, "God, you know what I'm going through, but I'm going to tell you again. I ask your help. I will try to accept it, no matter what your answer to me is. Oh, and here are some of my sins."
Here is what is going on with my money situation. I still owe money, but I talked to one of the people in the Admin building, about having my hold temporarily removed so that I could enroll for classes. She removed it, but I have until 6 Jan to pay off my bill for this semester. I am really hoping that I can do it. I can't allow myself to spend any money (which means I should probably cancel my netflix) until after this is taken cared of. I'm going to continue to pray to God about it. Really hoping it works out for me, but I need to trust God. He is in control.
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